Fake News #10

z used fake news ama (18)

Back in Short Trousers at Brocklehurst High

EXCLUSIVE Brocklehurst Bugle

(Photograph posed by models)

 

Boys up to the age of eighteen and beyond at Brocklehurst High will be made to wear short trousers as part of their school uniform from next term.

It is part of a new disciplinary regime that also sees the return of the whippy crook-handled rattan cane.

New headmaster Dr. GOF Powell made the announcement this week in a letter to parents of the 750 boys-only school.

Dr. Powell told the Brocklehurst Bugle in an interview, “The boys need to know that they are not yet adults. They are children and they should be treated as such. Wearing short trousers will be a constant reminder of that.

“They should also respect adults at all times and obey instructions.”

Dr. Powell became headmaster in January with the remit from school governors to “tighten up discipline”.

He said that after the government announced it would allow schools to reintroduce corporal punishment, Brocklehurst High wrote a new code of conduct.

“Boys will be left in no doubt about the consequences if they do not adhere to the rules,” he said.

Dr. Powell is on record as a strong supporter of the cane. He was one of a number of educationalists who lobbied for its reintroduction.

He told the Brocklehurst Bugle the cane could be used on boys of all ages, but he intended to target the eldest pupils in the sixth-form first.

“We have pupils who are eighteen years old and they have no idea how they are supposed to behave. There are only a few months before they leave school so we do not have time to waste. They must know that I will not hesitate to deliver a sound six-of-the-best across the backside of any sixth-former – including the prefects – if I deem they deserve such punishment.”

The new rulings have largely been welcomed by parents. Mrs. Alison Golightly, the chairwoman of the school’s Parent Teacher Association, told the Brocklehurst Bugle, “I think many parents will welcome the reintroduction of the cane. My own son is completely out of control at home. I have no husband and I hope the headmaster will beat some manners into him.”

Boys at the school had mixed reactions to the introduction of short trousers. Oliver Bateman-Manning, aged 18, the head boy of the school, said it might be good to wear short trousers in the hot summer months, but “they will freeze our knees off in winter”.

Another sixth-former who did not wish to be named said, “Short trousers can be very sexy. Of course, it depends on a boy’s legs and bum.”

Senior boys welcomed news of the reintroduction of the cane. John Herbert, aged 18, said, “Discipline has been poor for many years. A sore backside is a small price to pay if we get good A-level grades and get to a top university.”

 

Picture credit: Sting Pictures

More Fake News stories here

 

Other stories you might like

My first spanking — aged 18!

The headmaster’s guests

First day of term

 

More stories from Charles Hamilton II are on the MMSA website

 

Charles Hamilton the Second

charleshamiltonthesecond@gmail.com

 

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