Fake News # 14

New Neighbourhood Watch scheme a roaring success Brocklehurst Bugle A group of Brocklehurst residents are claiming a rip-roaring success with their new neighbourhood watch scheme. It came after people in The Avenue, a select street close to Widdicombe Wood, spotted ‘undesirables’ loitering around their houses. “They were mostly older teenaged boys,” Mr Ernie Flynn, 52, … Continue reading Fake News # 14

Neighbourhood Watch Vigilantes

The houses in The Avenue were big, many were sedate Edwardian monstrosities with attics occupied by teenagers or au pairs. Limed oak or pastel-sponged kitchens extended into pretty conservatories, and garages had been converted into home offices or games rooms. Front gardens were well tended, with not an ugly spotted laurel or dull privet to … Continue reading Neighbourhood Watch Vigilantes

The Meter Reader

The first time I visited the house I failed to notice the large green-and-gold school blazer hanging on a hook in the hallway, but I couldn’t miss the wooden paddle in the cupboard under the stairs. My heart skipped a beat and my face flushed. It took a super human effort not to pick it … Continue reading The Meter Reader

Fake News #9

Sneak housebreaker gets short, sharp shock Special to Standard-Recorder   A young housebreaker got more than he expected for when he snuck into a house in East Mason Creek Thursday. He did not know it was occupied by Art Greer, aged 29, a martial-arts expert, and his brother Harvey, 31. Mr. Greer told the Standard-Recorder … Continue reading Fake News #9

Fake News #6

Public spanking after disgusting cafeteria prank Special to Standard-Recorder Students at Mason Creek Community College took revenge on two of their own with a public spanking after they had played a disgusting prank with a salad. Marco  Berkovitz and Raphael Benitez, both aged nineteen, took a small bottle of salad dressing from the college dining … Continue reading Fake News #6

Fake News #1

Juvenile Crime Stats. at Record Low Special to Standard-Recorder Police in Mason Creek have a unique way to cut down on juvenile crime. It is fourteen inches long by three inches wide and made of hard maple. The old fashioned paddle is making a comeback. Police Chief Paddy Callaghan said the small community pop. 1,789 … Continue reading Fake News #1

Shoplifting

I am walking down Brocklehurst High Street heading for the Pound Shop. It is late summer and college restarts the next week and I need provisions like pens and paper and such like. Not, if I am going to be particularly honest about it, that I will put them to good use, since college for … Continue reading Shoplifting

Called home

Wayne trudged across the glistening pavement. The rain had stopped at last, but not for long, he reckoned. His shoes leaked and he squelched along. He turned the corner and there it was looming ahead of him. Nelson Mandela Tower, damp, grey and ugly. He had thought he had left this all behind. The street … Continue reading Called home

The wrong pub

Masher stared into the laptop, paused the image and made a screen grab. He had identified six of the lads now. Only one to go. The door to the small airless office opened and Big Boy Bonzo rumbled in. He nodded a perfunctory greeting and eased his considerable bulk into a swivel chair. “That the … Continue reading The wrong pub

Vigilantes

A group of them were talking in the pub. The beer was flowing. There was only one topic of conversation. Those bloody kids. The ones who congregated around the bus stop at night. Giving innocent folk grief. “Have you seen the graffiti? The swear words?” “They drink strong cider, then piss it up all over … Continue reading Vigilantes