Sports report

Good afternoon from the Old Mill ground where this thrilling First Division match ended with a 4-3 victory for the Town over title challengers Albion. The star of the show was once again whiz kid Stanley Mitchell, the eighteen-year-old amateur player who has burst onto the scene this season. Mitchell who is still a schoolboy … Continue reading Sports report

Cricket captain takes control

There were a group of about eight of us, stretching out and enjoying the sunshine. The cricket match we were watching had adjourned for the tea interval. The gap in play gave us the chance to discuss the latest scandal at the club. The exploits of Carstairs, one of the colts, a man barely turned … Continue reading Cricket captain takes control

The New Coach

“What in the name of glory just happened!!” Eleven young men carried on stripping off their kits. The post-match banter flew around the changing room. “I’m talking to you boys!” Louder. Angrier. Voices quietened. Silence at last. “So answer me? Who wants to tell me what just happened?” The boys shuffled nervously. Embarrassed. “Gillingwater!” The … Continue reading The New Coach

The Coach and the Schoolmaster

Coach Needham missed being able to spank the backsides of his rugby players: it had very nearly won them the league. He hadn’t started it; there was already a tradition at Barnaby Rugby Football Club where the guys would whack the arses of newcomers with a heavy clothes brush. He supposed it was following some … Continue reading The Coach and the Schoolmaster

Footballer’s Judicial Caning

“One hundred dollar fine; two hundred and fifty dollars to be paid in damages and four lashes of the cane on the bare buttocks. Take him away. Next case.” The twenty-eight-year-old footballer bitterly resented being in this God-forsaken African country. Tony Jeffries was an important name in European soccer and starred in a top club, … Continue reading Footballer’s Judicial Caning

Footballer’s Hairbrush Treatment

The new Chief Coach knew what he would do if he could have his way. A so-called top class footballer smoking cigarettes. What was the boy thinking? And, he still was a boy. Chief Coach Herbertsen had only recently been appointed to lead one of the best-known football clubs in the world and he was … Continue reading Footballer’s Hairbrush Treatment

Collection of captions

They can go to hell, see if I care. Let them admire the paddle marks on my bare ass.   Fancy a quick one? A hundred assorted drawings with captions supplied by Charles Hamilton II. Available as a book to download free of charge here. What he didn’t know was that although the club had … Continue reading Collection of captions

Fake News #7

Secret of Youth Athletic Club’s Success EXCLUSIVE Brocklehurst Bugle Coach Brian Tyler has revealed the secret behind Brocklehurst Athletic Club’s phenomenal success this season – the old-fashioned rubber-soled plimsoll. The young men at the Club – average age 19 – won both the town and the county championships this year. The first time in history … Continue reading Fake News #7

Fake News #2

Spanking for Fighting Soccer Star EXCLUSIVE The Daily Globe Sam Spencer, the nineteen-year-old Premier League footballer caught on CCTV brawling outside a nightclub, has been given “an old-fashioned” spanking, we can exclusively reveal. Spencer whose fight went viral on social media was taken across the knee of Newton Rovers manager Ron Thwistlethorp yesterday for a … Continue reading Fake News #2

The cricketer

He was about twenty years old; I was old enough to be his father. I was the coach at the Brocklehurst Cricket Club Colts – a rather archaic name for the youth team. I was a big cheese at the club on account of my time playing for the county side. It made me a … Continue reading The cricketer